I hate that every time i think this feeling has went away, every time I think I can trust you again something just pops up that makes me doubt you. I can never really tell if you’re being serious or just having a laugh like you say you are. I don’t know how much longer I can wait for this to go away, and I can’t live like this. Surely if I feel this way we can’t be meant to be together. I want this, god knows I fucking want this. I want you, but sometimes wanting something just isn’t enough. this isn’t healthy for me, or for you. It’s mentally draining every time I feel funny and the suicidal thoughts are coming back rapid. Heaven knows i’d die for you a hundred times for you, but I don’t know if I can die because of you. You’ve already killed me once, and I die a little more inside every day. How far can this go before I become an empty shell of what I once was, wasted away from your lies & greed , not to mention the sheer fact that you’ve never been happy with just one person. I thought that maybe I could be that one person, that somehow I was the exception. maybe that’s just what I wanted to believe. Maybe that’s just what I needed to.
sick of everyone and everything. don’t even know who i can trust anymore, if anyone. i wish there could just be another big bang so that everyone dies. cba being here anymore, and i don’t see why i should be the only one to go if yous are all the ones that are being arseholes to be quite frank so … all for one and one for all
sick of all this constant bullshit and feeling like i’m not good enough for you.